I had wanted to see her. I kept planning to visit. Several times last year I started to buy my ticket to Haiti, rent a truck and drive north to her to say hello. That’s it. No mission other than hello. I took a photo of Charlene two years ago in a green field of rice and though the photo itself has now a life of its own hanging on walls and even making it into a couple of magazines (http://ngm.nationalgeographic.com/your-shot/daily-dozen dec week 1 2009) , it is not a photograph that interests me, it is my friend who is in the photograph, the gentle charlene. So i wanted to get back to her before my memory tricked itself into turning a picture into a myth (a weakness of photography that though photos are meaningful, they give us the wrong sense that time has stopped). I wanted to see Charlene again so it will be our friendship I carry with me and not just a picture.
I arrived in Gonaives dust covered and tired. As soon as my feet touched the ground at Pacius’ house I asked, can we go find Charlene?
We pulled up where her little house is, a new home I was not familiar with. She was in a field and I did not see her. Pacius did and he pointed and said, Charlene, there she is. She was coming toward the truck slowly. I jumped out of the truck and when I did she erupted and ran toward me. I ran toward her and we caught each other. She had run saying my name and I said hers too and she said, you remember my name. She said again, you remember my name after so long!
My friend Dr. Mike Justus told me once while we were traveling together in Haiti that what matters most is never the stuff we bring but simply that we dare to show up. Our presence is what matters most. I am learning how true this is in every part of my life. With my daughter, with my family, with anyone. Just dare to be present. Even if for only a few minutes.
I stood with Charlene on her porch and chatted and her mother joined us holding Charlene’s cousins and I snapped this new photo. It is a portrait of me as much as her. This is a picture of me daring to show up.
There is a sad part to this experience too. Later my Haitian friend, my driver, Clerge, showed me a photograph of his 4-year-old daughter that he is carrying in his wallet. she is a cute little girl in a red shirt standing in a professional photo studio. The photograph was taken 12 days before her birthday this past October. She looks happy. No one knew at the time this photograph was taken that within three months she would be dead, buried beneath a mountain of rubble that was once her family’s house. But that is the case. Clerge said today he is very sad. I just stood there on a step holding the photograph of his daughter now lost and there was nothing I could do or say. I could only be present and stand quietly with my friend.
Uploaded by: flip holsinger on 27th February, 2010.
This is what it is all about knowing individuals loving and caring for them. Jesus taught us the importance of a name. He had a special name for each of his close friends. One that reflected his love for them. We must establish relationships that do the same. I pray your efforts to love Charlene and her family will result in her falling in love with Jesus.
Wow. This reminds me a little of the Nooma video about “sitting shivah” (not sure if that is spelled right). Basically, the narrator went to be with a friend after the passing of a loved one and just was. He sat outside and helped when needed…but was mainly there for his friend…by just being there. I am not great with words, or talented at many things…but I can be present. What a blessing in your life and in Charlene’s life to have the knowledge that someone a world away know your name and remembers you. How AMAZING that God knows our name!